05 January 2012

Cookies

Most of life's problems can be solved over cookies, so pull up a chair, and help yourself to a cookie!

I use them a lot in my line of work, and before my office got repossessed by the EOD guys, I usually kept cookies in my desk drawer. The Army is big on open door policies.... Mine is an "open drawer" policy.
Nothing says "chill the fuck out, and tell me what the problem is" quite like a box of double stuffed Oreos and some water (I'm not your damn mother, if you were expecting milk..... Also, you wouldn't want milk from my drawer).
Being a Captain, young soldiers can sometimes be uncomfortable opening up about their problems. But, as part of the medical section, it is my duty to look out for the welfare of soldiers. God knows there are plenty of self-serving leaders in the military who don't care about their troops. We have had a suicide and an attempted suicide in my unit. In the last year. A soldier, having "cheated on their spouse" down range, and been caught, had become a Pariah among those in their unit. Lost all their rank, was getting a divorce, and losing custody of their kid, all as they were returning from deployment. I am the first one to dismiss cheaters from my life, but no one stopped to think "hey, maybe something is happening with Pvt so-and-so." Maybe they would have realized that the soldiers spouse had cheated on them, and sent them divorce papers. And in a moment of weakness, the soldier had sought comfort in a friend, and it turned into something else. Only in the military are people truly punished for adultery. Civilian spouses can't be, but soldiers can.

I'm not saying this was the case, but a persons life was destroyed (career, marriage, education) and no one stopped to check on the soldier, whether they liked each other or not. The soldier returned, got lost in the system, and within a week they shot themself.

Something similar happened at my old work, a guy in human resources lost his kids, house, life savings in a divorce to a spouse that was seeing someone else. The guy was a bit full of himself... And no one bothered to ever ask him how he was doing, because we didnt like him. He hung himself in his craptastic studio apartment... And it took them a week to notice.

Or my parents neighbor, 8mi up the road. Elderly man, who had lost his wife of 60 years, and none of his children could be bothered to visit. He didn't have many friends, as most had died over the years, and the rest were in poor health. He took every pill in the house, trying to cure the loneliness.



So... Have a fucking cookie, and tell me how your life is going! And you go ask someone else how they are doing! And actually listen to them!
Do you have an elderly neighbor? Got introduce yourself! Find out their interests and hobbies! If their grandchildren never visit, you may even get an adopted grandparent for your kids! Maybe even a babysitter. If all else fails, give them your number, put out an open invitation for the holidays, etc.
Same goes for any other neighbor you have! Get to know your damn neighbors! Is there a single mom near you? Someone with kids the same age as yours? Help each other out. Swap play date days, help out when they are sick, etc.
My best friend from back home is a sheriffs deputy. After my mum's big surgery three years ago, that put her on crutches and canes for a year and a half, my friend made sure the local kids shoveled their snow, and mowed their grass for them. My mom paid them in cookies, lemonade, and use of the back grounds for paintball, four-wheeling, etc.

We have become a self entered society! We need to get back to the days of the cookies!

Now, for reading this, help yourself to a cookie! And feel free to talk to me about anything! I'm here if you need me!

2 comments:

  1. Think I'm going to invest in some fucking cookies.

    I love that each of your posts expose a little more of you and always leave the reader thinking. With each one I read and each post I see on fb, I'm more glad I found your page :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. I think my job on this earth is to help other people learn to give of their damn selves, and stop being so selfish......and I'm a blunt asshole, lol

    I'm glad you like my blogs!

    ReplyDelete

Add your thoughts, praise, or belittleance (yes, now a word) here!